I can't sleep. I shouldn't anyways as I have a sociology paper to start/finish but it's difficult to concentrate on these things with everything that's kind of resting on my shoulders right now. I keep sitting here thinking of how I've come to this point. In one semester I've managed to tear my ACL, I've made a complete fool of myself to certain people and I think they'd like to do without me. And now I don't even know what my near future is going to have in store for me. Honestly I would have never expected myself to reach here. I don't consider myself a bad person yet I keep getting caught in bad situations. And right now I want something that can just make me feel better... be it drugs, sex, alcohol... all things that are still really unexplored to me and things that I've been afraid of misusing. But now I wonder if I'm going to miss out on certain opportunities or if maybe that's why I've found myself in these situations in the first place. Maybe I can make up for lost time before it's all too late. I know that's not me, but I'd definitely like something to numb all of this... I know there's nothing that's going to change what has already happened. So what now???